Learn the tea order of every ward sister before you even think about asking for a favour — Margaret on the night shift takes hers black with one sugar and she's controlled the rota since 2003. Your knees will never forgive you for skipping the hoist just because Mr. Henderson in Bed 3 swears he's "light as a feather, love" at 3am. And for god's sake, eat your lunch sitting down instead of scrolling through Rightmove between obs checks — the flats aren't going anywhere, but your appetite will.